Forgiving or punishing the terrorists is left to God.
But, fixing their appointment with God is our responsibility - Indian Army
Updated statement for this IN S/W INDUSTRY........
Forgiving or punishing the Developer is left to Manager. But, fixing their appointment with Manager is our responsibility - Tester
Forgiving or punishing the Manager is left to Client. But, fixing their appointment with Client is our responsibility - Developer
Tougher time
-----------------------------
"I've just had the most awful time," said a boy to his friends. "First I got angina pectoris, then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering, I got psoriasis. They gave me hypodermics, and to top it all, tonsillitis was followed by appendectomy."
"Wow! How did you pull through?" sympathized his friends.
"I don't know," the boy replied. "Toughest spelling test I ever had."
Miscommunication
Tax - Tax - Tax
Read Like Kattabomman Sivaji
Neer than salaried Employee'oooo....
Neer than P. Chidambaramoo......
P.Chidambaram: Ithuvarai varudam Rs. 2500 seluthi vanda Professional Tax ai inimel varudam Rs.7500, athavathu matham Rs.625 Vari arasuku selutha
vendum.....
vari, vatti, kisthi...
Yaarai ketkirai vari...
Etharkku ketkirai vari..
bug polikirathu.. Revenue vilaigirathu..
Unakken katta vendum vari.
Projects kuvigirathu varumanam varugirathu
Unakken Katta vendum vatti
Engalodu Supportukku vanthayaa? bug fix panninaaya? documentation seidhaaya ?
Allathu, konji vilayadum bench ill ullavargalukku Training than koduthayaa? Clienta? Project managera?
Maanagettavanea...
Men's perspective...
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her - DavidBissonette
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. - Socrates
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. - Anonymous
The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?" - Dumas
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.- Sigmund Freud
"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't." - James Holt McGavra
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it, 2. Whenever you're right, shut up. - Patrick Murra
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once... - Nash
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. - Rodney Dangerfield
Origin of the Species
A little girl asked her mother, "How did the human race come about?"
The mother answered: "God made Adam and Eve and they had children and all mankind came from them."
Two days later she asks her father the same question.
The father answered: "Many years ago there were monkeys, and we developed from them."
The confused girl returns to her mother and says:
"Mummy how is it possible that you told me that the human race was created by God and Daddy says we developed from monkeys?"
The mother answers: "Well dear, it is very simple. I told you about the origin of my side of the family, and your father told you about his."
Here is the reason. Why Newton Committed Suicide.....
Once, Newton came to India and watched a few Tamil movies that had his head spinning. He was convinced that all his logic and laws in physics were just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything he had done.
In the movie of Rajanikanth, Newton was confused to such an extent that he went paranoid. Here are a few scenes
1) Rajanikanth has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors can't be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights, our great Rajanikanth is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is cured! Long Live Rajanikanth!
2) In another movie, Rajanikanth is confronted with 3 gangsters. Rajanikanth has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet and a knife. Guess, what he does?
He throws the knife at the middle gangster? & shoots the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the middle one.
3) Rajanikanth is chased by a gangster. Rajanikanth has a revolver but no bullets in it. Guess, what he does. Nah? not even in your remotest imaginations.
He waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots, Rajanikanth opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun. Bang... the gangster dies...
This was too much for our Newton to take! He was completely shaken and decided to go back. But he happened to see another movie for one last time, and thought that at least one movie would follow his theory of physics. The whole movie goes fine and Newton is happy that all in the world hasn't changed. Oops, not so fast!
The 'climax' finally arrives. Rajanikanth gets to know that the villain is on the other side of a very high wall. So high that Rajanikanth can't jump even if he tries like one of those superman techniques that our heroes normally use.Rajanikanth has to desperately kill the villain because it's the climax. (Newton dada is smiling since it is virtually impossible?)
Rajanikanth suddenly pulls two guns from his pockets. He throws one gun in the air and when the gun has reached above the height of the wall, he uses the second gun and shoots at the trigger of the first gun in air. The first gun fires off and the villain is dead.
Newton commits suicide...
You can understand better with this picture.
Sample Leave letters
** Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one-week leave.
** From an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son: "as I want to shave my son's head, please leave me for two days.."
** Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:
"as I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's leave.."
** "As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave."
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